Zombie Apocalypse?

When I first started seeing the postings on Facebook about the CDC having a Zombie Apocalypse Plan, I thought it was one of those hacker links....so imagine my surprise when I typed in CDC.gov, went to Emergency Preparedness and Response and saw the link for the Zombie Apocalypse.  I understand that they are trying to put a cute spin on being prepared for any disaster...but this is AMERICA, and I think they have no idea how unprepared we are.

What about the ZOMBIES?  They have all this focus on how for the non-zombies to survive, but let's face it, in the event of a Zombie Apocalypse I will probably be turned into a zombie.  I have ZERO athletic ability and a love of cookies.  I'll be one of the first to be turned. 

The CDC says for starters that we'll be quarantined and they will find what caused this outbreak and how to treat it.  This is going to be quite costly to the taxpayers.  At this point, I will no longer be concerned with the concept of a taxpayer because in the future they will be looked at as a potential meal....but nonetheless, it will be costly.  First of all, all zombies seem to have open wounds from what I see.  Treating them alone is bad enough, but let's add in the fact that I'll be decomposing simultaneously and on top of that, everyone who tries to treat me will risk being eaten.  I'm pretty sure they'll find a cure, but what will I have to live with after that?  Scars, disfigurement and doctor bills--that's what!

Secondly, I'm going to have a rather restrictive diet.  No longer can I whip up some Hamburger Helper or Ramen Noodles, now I want PEOPLE, and apparently that's taboo and probably expensive.  How is the CDC going to accommodate that?  You can't feed a lion a salad here, got it?  And I think a zombie will be smart enough to know the difference in human and whatever substitute (probably chicken).

Finally, in the event of this Zombie Apocalypse, what's going to happen when I become human again?  Would I want to become human again?  Will the zombies be given a choice?  I, for one, would like to be the first to advocate for zombie rights!  Who's with me?! (You only have until 6:00 pm tomorrow to decide because I think that's when it begins!)